Tuesday, March 21, 2006
I told my wife that I hope her Dad has or will find a social outlet when the house grows quiet. He has made it clear a year ago Christmas in a family prayer that he was the one ready to go, the world belongs to the young. It will be hard for him, he cried at the side of his wife's bed saying he wants to go with her.
My wife said I was like her dad, I didn't know what she meant. She said my world revolves her and the family, like her dad's world revolved around his wife. She is so right, she is my best friend and my world does revolve around her. She won't be home until Friday night, I miss her.
My wife said I was like her dad, I didn't know what she meant. She said my world revolves her and the family, like her dad's world revolved around his wife. She is so right, she is my best friend and my world does revolve around her. She won't be home until Friday night, I miss her.
Saturday, March 18, 2006
May my Mother-in-law rest in peace as she travels a new and uncharted trail.
Friday, March 17, 2006
I thought I would end the story about my MIL because she was so close to death,. At this moment she is still hanging in there, unbelievable, she hasn't eaten in nearly two weeks, my wife is baffled. She has never seen this in 20 years as a nurse. I told her it was because she had such good care around the clock. My FIL's prayers is that she go now and be out of pain. It is getting difficult for everyone involved. Each day we think she will go, but she hasn't, I am sure I would have checked out long ago in such a condition. We also would like Kate get back home too, she has been gone long enough. Despite that, the kids and I are coping well. It did get a bit quiet yesterday around here, both kids had something to do after school till evening.
I have to wonder if my MIL was trying to hold on and for what. All her kids and grandkids have been by to see her while she was alert. Maybe she is scared, but I would have thought that the pain would make one feel otherwise. She has a strong heart, that is for sure. I told my wife if I thought she didn't like me, she was doing this to keep us apart, of course that is not the case, I think ;-)
I have to wonder if my MIL was trying to hold on and for what. All her kids and grandkids have been by to see her while she was alert. Maybe she is scared, but I would have thought that the pain would make one feel otherwise. She has a strong heart, that is for sure. I told my wife if I thought she didn't like me, she was doing this to keep us apart, of course that is not the case, I think ;-)
Monday, March 13, 2006
I have changed my reading material, it used to be church related and though there are a couple of books still on the list in that dept. my satiation with them is near the carrying capacity. Right now I am reading Ray Jardine's "Beyond Backpacking" It's an all you want to know on ultra light backpacking. I get a few pages in here and there such as when I am waiting at school for my daughter after track practice. Considering those I have been around, my pack weight is not so bad, compared to Ray, i am carrying quite the load. My pack with food and H2O is under 35 lb., I have heard of 50-60 lb. pack weights, but with my frame, I couldn't do that, period.
On Ray's first hike across the Pacific Crest Trail (PCT) his pack weight (minus food and water) was 25 lb. on his third trip on the PCT his pack weight was less than 9 lb.. Embarrassingly, my pack alone is around 5 lb.. It is obvious that a lighter pack equals more miles a day that are less stressful to the body. I don't think I will get that light any time soon, but I do plan to whittle away the ounces over time and reduce the weight considerably. I am looking forward to this summer.
Sunday, March 12, 2006
We had snow on Thursday and Friday, amazing for March. The higher elevations around town must have gotten more snow because we didn't have enough here to justify closing school for those two days. My oldest was disappointed they canceled school, she would rather go to school so she can get some socializing in. It makes for a long weekend.
I think my wife will be home in a weeks time, she has worked hard and lost a lot of sleep taking care of here mother but her work is nearly done. Her dad, brother and sisters stand back and let her do all the care, my wife says she's gotten a little possessive of it anyways. She has been able to spend a lot of time with her mom talking, her mom has been coherent the whole time. I think when my wife gets home, she will feel like she was in some kind of dream.
Her sister's husband was getting annoyed that his wife was spending so much time away from home because of this family crisis, she said think of Trail Seeker, he doesn't get to see his wife at all. That seemed to put a little more perspective on things for him. There was a time that I would likely feel a bit of resentment at the extended absence of my wife, but now I can patiently wait for her. The kids have been a big help around here helping keep things caught up, and they help keep the house full of life which is very important.
I am most concerned for my wife's dad, the house is going to be very quiet, I am sure it can take a toll on him and be hard to adjust to. He doesn't want to be alone and would prefer it be him in that bed rather than her. At this point he feels everyday she is here is a bonus unfortunately the rope is coming to an end. I think I will end this story here.
I think my wife will be home in a weeks time, she has worked hard and lost a lot of sleep taking care of here mother but her work is nearly done. Her dad, brother and sisters stand back and let her do all the care, my wife says she's gotten a little possessive of it anyways. She has been able to spend a lot of time with her mom talking, her mom has been coherent the whole time. I think when my wife gets home, she will feel like she was in some kind of dream.
Her sister's husband was getting annoyed that his wife was spending so much time away from home because of this family crisis, she said think of Trail Seeker, he doesn't get to see his wife at all. That seemed to put a little more perspective on things for him. There was a time that I would likely feel a bit of resentment at the extended absence of my wife, but now I can patiently wait for her. The kids have been a big help around here helping keep things caught up, and they help keep the house full of life which is very important.
I am most concerned for my wife's dad, the house is going to be very quiet, I am sure it can take a toll on him and be hard to adjust to. He doesn't want to be alone and would prefer it be him in that bed rather than her. At this point he feels everyday she is here is a bonus unfortunately the rope is coming to an end. I think I will end this story here.
Thursday, March 09, 2006
I got the news that my Uncle Benny past away this morning, my wife got news that her Uncle is terminally ill too. It seems that this stuff is happening more and more to those around me as time goes by, both young and old.
This is the song I try to live with:
Seize the Day
I know a girl who was schooled in Manhattan She reads dusty books and learns phrases in Latin She is an author, or maybe a poet A genius but it's just this world doesn't know it She works on her novel most every day If you laugh she will say
chorus: Seize the day, seize whatever you can 'Cause life slips away just like hourglass sand Seize the day, pray for grace from God's hand Then nothing will stand in your way Seize the day
Well I know a doctor, a fine young physician Left his six-figure job for a mission position He's healing the sick in an African clinic He works in the dirt and writes home to the cynics He says "We work through the night so most every day As we watch the sun rise we can say
chorus
Well I know a man who's been doing some thinking He's as bitter and cold as the whiskey he's drinking He's talking 'bout fear, about chances not taken If you listen to him you can hear his heart breaking He says "One day you're a boy and the next day you're dead I wish way back when someone had said
chorus
Well one thing I've noticed, wherever I wander Everyone's got a dream he can follow or squander You can do what you will with the days you are given I'm trying to spend mine on the business of living So I'm singing my songs off of any old stage You can laugh if you want, I'll still say
chorus
Carolyn Arends
This is the song I try to live with:
Seize the Day
I know a girl who was schooled in Manhattan She reads dusty books and learns phrases in Latin She is an author, or maybe a poet A genius but it's just this world doesn't know it She works on her novel most every day If you laugh she will say
chorus: Seize the day, seize whatever you can 'Cause life slips away just like hourglass sand Seize the day, pray for grace from God's hand Then nothing will stand in your way Seize the day
Well I know a doctor, a fine young physician Left his six-figure job for a mission position He's healing the sick in an African clinic He works in the dirt and writes home to the cynics He says "We work through the night so most every day As we watch the sun rise we can say
chorus
Well I know a man who's been doing some thinking He's as bitter and cold as the whiskey he's drinking He's talking 'bout fear, about chances not taken If you listen to him you can hear his heart breaking He says "One day you're a boy and the next day you're dead I wish way back when someone had said
chorus
Well one thing I've noticed, wherever I wander Everyone's got a dream he can follow or squander You can do what you will with the days you are given I'm trying to spend mine on the business of living So I'm singing my songs off of any old stage You can laugh if you want, I'll still say
chorus
Carolyn Arends
Monday, March 06, 2006
My wife say that her mother only has a few days left, she had to take care of some new problems this morning that she hasn't had to deal with but is symptomatic of her disease. After she is done, she will stick around and stay with her sister till services are over. I thought it would be tougher than it has been to have her away, but the kids have made it easier by being helpful.
Saturday, March 04, 2006
My wife reports that her mother grows weaker by the day, I have no idea how my MIL feels deep down, but she shows a positive attitude. She is also planning her funeral as she goes along. Kate will be getting some time away Tuesday to visit with her childhood friend MJ.
MJ and her daughter came out this past summer, it was there first visit here. Kate and MJ are frequent emailers. I tease my wife a bit because she can write long emails, I tell her she doesn't have to write a novel every time. Since she doesn't want to talk much on the phone due to ease dropping (she doesn't feel right talking about everyone while they are there), she has been emailing me. She hasn't written a novel to me yet, but it is enough. Actually I like the emails better than the phone because she can open up with me.
I am getting back into a routine, the kids keep me busy and track, homework, and piano helps keep them busy after school. things are working out pretty good. A co-worker plans to open a PTO bank next week for Kate, It allows employees to donate some of there paid time off hours. My wife has set up PTO banks for others and given her PTO hours. The company has to agree to it and will take care of the shuffle. It is nice of them to create a bank, but we are not to worried now about finances, it will all work out.
MJ and her daughter came out this past summer, it was there first visit here. Kate and MJ are frequent emailers. I tease my wife a bit because she can write long emails, I tell her she doesn't have to write a novel every time. Since she doesn't want to talk much on the phone due to ease dropping (she doesn't feel right talking about everyone while they are there), she has been emailing me. She hasn't written a novel to me yet, but it is enough. Actually I like the emails better than the phone because she can open up with me.
I am getting back into a routine, the kids keep me busy and track, homework, and piano helps keep them busy after school. things are working out pretty good. A co-worker plans to open a PTO bank next week for Kate, It allows employees to donate some of there paid time off hours. My wife has set up PTO banks for others and given her PTO hours. The company has to agree to it and will take care of the shuffle. It is nice of them to create a bank, but we are not to worried now about finances, it will all work out.
Thursday, March 02, 2006
Enjoy the flowers (and waterfalls) along the trail of life.
